Fuck
Fuck man. It’s like my fucking birthday today and I just feel so fucking depressed and shit. fuck. How did time go by so fast? Where did it all go? Sigh. I just want today to be over..I don’t even want a party…I wish we could’ve just went out to eat or something..like a dinner..augh. To make matters worse, my dad is inviting all of our neighbors -_- omg:( and we just finished painting and putting in flowers around the house, so it’s also like a new house warming kind of thing. But fuckkkk. I hope the neighbors are all busy…:( it would’ve been cool if it was someone else’s bday, but nooo, it had to be mine when the house was done:( fuck. At least my mom said the party starts at 6pm, the days almost gone and ppl will only stay for like 2 hours. They have to right? Ugh. I’m not 12 anymore. I’m fucking two decades. Fuck. I wanna do something with my friends:( too much family time. Next week is gonna be bomb, hopefully. It’s what I can look forward to.
Everyone is out working right now, fixing everything. I’m here in the room, in my moms room, since my grandmas taking rest in mine. Even my cousins are out helping. Everyone is going crazy trying to finish. And here I am. I don’t know if I should go out or not. I mean, I should but like it’s just so depressing. I thought, honestly, that I wad going to cry once the clock turned to the 28th, but here I am. I mean, eventually I’ll cry-I think. It’s just so sad.
I’m not a teen you know? I’m fucking two zero. DAMN. I could like start a family. I could get married. Ugh. It’s just so depressing because I haven’t done anything that I can say like wow you know? It’s just so sad. Agh, but fuck it. I’m just gonna live this day. Oh wells.
FUCK MAN
i just worked out, and now im like really hungry. what the fuck yo? all that working out, and now i have to gain back what i worked out? OH HELLLLL NAWWWWWW. THE FUCK? my body wishes it would eat that ice cream…that piece of drumstick ice-cream that’s in our freezer…in the cold…just sitting there…FUCKKK YOUUUUU ICEE-CREAMMMMM! im on a mission. A mission to get my perfect bod, so NO! ice-cream no!
-i’ll just eat these fucking graham crackers, naaw just kidding…im just going to cry :{ on how i cant eat ice cream :{ omg. auuuuughhh!
When I die
I’ll make all my websites available to the public. Tumblr, twitter, facebook (I guess i’ll use that more), but yeah. It’s so all of you know what I was going through when you knew me. When you knew the outside me, not the inside. THIS here, on tumblr and twitter, is the inside. It may not be all of it, but it’s most of it-on the days in which i truly feel like expressing myself of social networking sites.
Know that this isn’t available, or wasn’t available, when I would be writing these posts. But it will be, when i choose to have it publicized. Maybe I’ll be that famous story about the girl whom everyone knew-happy and what not-but whom they never realized was hurting. So she finally, killed herself.
Yeah.
Bye.
